Hilarious Customer Reviews for the Sigma 200-500mm Lens on Amazon

Of all the camera lenses offered on Amazon, the $26,000 35-pound giant green Sigma 200-500mm f/2.8 probably has the funniest customer reviews and images.

Here’s a sampling:

Almost better than my $150 55-500mm Point and Shoot!

Good deal from Amazon. I was actually just surfing around looking for a replacement point and shoot camera when I happily stumbled upon the sigma zoom lens. When I saw that it was $38,000 I knew I had to have it. But then I saw that it was on sale for only $24,000. Oh Joy. I ordered two of them. For only 20 grand more, I now have two 100 pound lenses. They fit nicely on my old $50 Pentax SLR.

I tried this lens while shooting birds at Yosemite but the park ranger called the SWAT team on me because he thought I was trying to bazooka the wildlife. End of trip.

I needed a crowd photo for my art director but four cop cars drew down on me because they thought I was trying to fire a missile at pedestrians. End of shooting session.

I finally was able to use this lens to break down the front door to my home because I locked myself out the other day. It broke the door down nicely but unfortunately, the lens shattered in the process. It’s a good thing that I purchased two of these.

In short, if you are looking to pay over 100 times more for a telephoto zoom lens instead of a point and shoot zoom camera for a little under $200, this is absolutely a steal at $24K because you’re saving $10K on the purchase. Oh, did I mention it’s free shipping on this item?

The downside is that I can’t keep this lens in the house because it scares my children and pets. But so be it, I love this lens. [#]

Well worth the sacrifice…

Some may feel that this lens is a tad pricey but many forget about the needless things in their life that they can sell in order to purchase this beast. I immediately sold my vehicle because I was finally able to convince myself that I only use my vehicle a couple hours out of the day. It was sad that I even had to contemplate selling my car for this camera attachment but to somewhat justify my hesitation in selling it, I do drop off my children at school and use it as transportation to and from work every day. So, once I sold it, I realized that I had to come up with another $21,000.

I tried selling my apartment, but my landlord indicated that I could not legally do that. Whatever, Jim (Because I have learned not to burn bridges from past experiences, I stopped having open houses. Plus, the lawyer and court fees would put a damper on my upcoming Amazon purchase). Where was I going to come up with this $21,000? That’s when a Sigma light bulb went off in my head.

I sold my two children to the Pesticide & Insecticide Testing Corporation. I feel it was a solid move on my part because they explained that my (now their’s) children would always have enough to eat, exercise every day, and have a doctor present 24/7. With the money I made with this no-brainer sell and the under-the-table cash my wife was getting from working on the prestigious corner of Main Street and Almond Street, I was finally able to make the purchase of a lifetime.

I even had some extra cash leftover, so I decided to buy my first digital camera. This green monster looks great on my brand new Canon Rebel XSi. Thanks Sigma! [#]

The “Big Bang” Looks Beautiful From Here

I purchased this lens with the intent to look back in space-time and see the Big Bang unfold first hand. I must say it was a little difficult to find the correct line of visibility within the Hubble Deep Field, but after a few precision adjustments, I was finally looking at the origins of our universe. Seriously Awesome!

I don’t want to spoil it for you, but you CAN make out God quite nicely while he’s assembling the fundamental forces of physics. Teaser: He’s NOT a white dude with a beard! [#]

Pro fotog

This is a great lens. Have had it for 2 weeks now. Mostly use it in macro mode in my search for the Higgs boson. But when not using for subatomic particle work, I use for weddings. One client was getting married a few hundred miles away. Of course I didn’t need to fly in for the wedding…thank you Sigma. Yes, this lens has its drawbacks, we all know about them – yes you are actually focusing on things that potentially happened long ago – get over it. With low CA and a flat field of view – I can live with the drawbacks.

One note: my copy FF a little when inside the earth-moon radius, and I don’t have AF micro adjust on my rebel xt. Sent in to Sigma for adjustment and came back fine. Even with all the trouble, still great upgrade from my kit lens. [#]

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